I was having a chat with a friend today. As we talked about our interests, sports, abilities and so forth; I realised something about myself which came as a surprise. I became conscious that, although my parents, teachers and church members have invested so much in me in terms of their time, money and knowledge, I have very few practical skills. I can score pretty good results, lead in societies, speak intelligibly; but I have almost zero understanding of some crucial aspects of life. And not only practical skills, but everyday things like being able to swat a cockroach instead of running away and passing the newspaper roll to someone else.
Inventory check. I don’t know how to cook. I don’t sew very well, can mend a button passably but not good enough sew a dress. I can’t play any musical instruments. I don’t play any sport (only jogging once in a while, which doesn’t really count). I can’t draw, a sad disappointment. I can’t speak Hokkien (though I know a few languages). Oh, and I also can’t dance. I never learned any martial arts like Taekwondo. I don’t know computer programming. Even this blog takes a long time to personalize because it has to be done by trial and error. I would definitely be at a loss at how to survive if I got lost in the jungle; because: I can’t cook (as mentioned before), I’ve never hunted or fished, I don’t know how to read the constellations, and I don’t know first aid (besides applying a bandage and antiseptic).
So what did this realisation mean to me? It actually humbles me because it reminds me how dependent I am on others. I don’t work for a living yet, so I still live on my parent’s money. Everything I eat and drink, wear, read and even the bed I sleep on belongs to them. Likewise, my whole lifestyle hinges on this comfortable society where everyone looks to someone else to solve any problems not directly within their field of expertise. Child not doing well? Send to tuition. Don’t like to cook? Cater food. No time for chores? Get a maid. And the list goes on.
It reminds me of Piggy; the civilised, adult figure in Lord of the Flies by William Golding. He could not survive on the tropical island where survival of the fittest reigned, because he was conditioned to polite society where intellectualism was respected and all basic needs were taken care of in the community. If I were on that island too, would I perish too?
Probably, but it’s quite unlikely that I’ll ever find myself in that situation. Perhaps, more importantly, I should be learning how to run the little things of life on my own. To fix a leak, to read a map properly, to *gasp!* cook a few dishes. These abilities may not be highly valued in our specialised-skill, knowledge-centric world now, but it will certainly make life easier even for a high-flying, busy professional, right? (But don’t tell any of my chauvinistic male friends who think it’s my duty as a woman to cook that I’m going to learn it.)
My interests so far have often been centred on those things that I feel I can do well: acheiving results, organising events, leading a team, speaking, writing and singing. Maybe it’s time I broke out of that self-imposed mould, and surprise myself (and those chauvinistic male friends) with just how resourceful and multi-talented people can become when they dare to try something new. Perhaps this is the period in my life when I can unearth and explore another side of me, free from the tyranny of exam dates and Everest piles of schoolwork.
Another point not to be scoffed at, being able to do things dispels the notion of one being a nerd, a bookworm, a geek…and might even make someone…dare we say it…cool? Of course, that’s not the main reason I’d do this. Definitely not. Out of the question. No way.
All the same, enthusiastic as I am about upgrading my life to one with (a little) more survival value and becoming a more multi-faceted individual…
I’m still not keen on squashing a cockroach.
Originally written on 6 May 2007, when the Teh Tarik Academy was shut down temporarily due to modem failure.
Add: Due to an change in working plans soon, the guitar and cooking part might not go through. But the spirit of the essay still remains, anyway.
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