Sunday, October 28, 2007

Inequalities

Love is a tanglewood tree in a bower of green

In a forest at dawn

Fair while the mockingbird sings,

but she soon lifts her wings

And the music is gone

Young lovers in the tall grass with their hearts open wide

When the red summer poppies bloom

But love is a trackless domain and the rumor of rain

In the late afternoon

-Tanglewood Tree, Dave Carter



He pulled on his cup of tea, he nursed it, he smothered it in leathery hands. And in his mind he played the same question over and over again like a child's wail: "Why did she go? Why did she leave me? So alone, so alone, so alone..."



The night would last forever, all nights did and by the time the weak sunlight pushed through his window-blinds he would be exhausted, not having moved an inch in his hard oak chair or slept even for a wink.



But tonight, tonight was the worst kind: the storm crashing outside, wind howling like a scene from Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. He destested the clichedness of the whole situation but was powerless to fight the rolling waves of emotions that engulfed him.

He would close his eyes, but sometimes that made it worse. She would be back; fire burning his dull pupils and turning them into ash. Her smile would cut him into a thousand pieces. And he would recall her smell: undescribable but reminiscent of fresh clothes and lilac blooms. It would never fail to calm him down when he was upset about the condition at the store or the unreasonable demands of his employer.

She was a shooting star blazing bright in the sky, as dazzling as it was distant. And he was no more than earth, the ground from which we rise and eventually fall back to, red dust returning to red dust.

P/S: Sorry for the infrequent posts lately...each time I start I never get to finish because there's always one commitment or another to run to. Hope you enjoyed this and remember to comment!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

nice story! like the way you used some words e.g. 'the sun pushed through the window-blinds'. Quite poetic the story is.

Anonymous said...

i love that tanglewood tree poem. i liked the story too - but would like to see more of the ambiguity and humor and that certain wryness that you have. Some lovely sentences tho.

Anonymous said...

I think your story can be - should be - expanded because I want to know what happened that separated the two of them, why did such event have to happen, how the tension was built, why is he so infatuated with her, and who is she to him.

Does this story have any symbolism? It'd be nice to have a certain amount of symbolism. :)

Tea-puller said...

The symbolism is of the author writing it in two parts. At the beginning, s/he is sad, lonely and frustrated and looking for a release. The second part is after the author goes to extracurricular activities, comes back to finish the entry in a less depressed mood. And because s/he is rushing to finish it or s/he never will, the story isn't polished or thought out as well as it should be.

:P

TP